Self-perception is a concept related to how we know ourselves and how we perceive ourselves. However, although this may sound simple, not everyone knows themselves as well as they think.
How is the Perception of Self Formed?
Self-perception is not innate, it is formed over time. It is shaped by the interaction of a person's true self with the environment into which he was born.
Among the elements that can affect self-perception, we can list the following:
- genetic factors
- society in which one lives
- Parents and upbringing
- Circle of friends
- cultural values
- Other relatives and acquaintances
- Teachers
…In short, all the concepts and personalities we interact with can contribute to our sense of self.
Self-Perception Development and Childhood
Famous psychologist Carl Rogers' self-perception theory states that there is a close relationship between the love a child receives from his family and his self-perception. During these periods, what our parents taught us, their own values and personality traits that they reflect on us, and the objects and emotions we identify with are at the basis of our self-perception.
According to some research in this field:
- There may be a connection between the teacher's belief and the child's self-perception. According to these studies, if a teacher believes in a student's abilities, the child's self-perception is strengthened.
- Stories heard as a child can also be important in developing a sense of self. For example, in one study, it was concluded that female readers who were affected by a story in which traditional gender roles were at the forefront (such as a woman as a housewife, a man as a working person) developed a more feminist self-perception than those who were not affected by the story.
- Mass media also have a huge impact on self-perception. When the media supports and highlights certain stereotypes and ideals (such as being thin is beautiful), it affects people's self-perception. The individual may view these promoted ideals as standards for oneself to follow. Internalization of these ideals causes the self-perception to be shaped according to these criteria.
- What Does a Well-Developed Self-Perception Mean?
Having a well-developed sense of self means; In fact, it means that a person knows himself as well as possible, accepts himself, understands himself, analyzes himself without judging when necessary, and improves himself when necessary.
Contrary to popular belief, this is not the same as “positive self-perception,” meaning that this person does not have to perceive himself positively. However, he has a certain insight, does not shy away from his own mistakes, and can accept criticism to improve himself. This actually creates self-confidence, which can often help develop a positive self-perception.
Someone with a strong sense of self:
- He knows who he is.
- He knows what he thinks, his own ideas.
- He knows what his individual values are and defends them.
- He is not easily influenced by others.
- He/she has no problem recognizing his/her mistakes, admitting them, and receiving constructive criticism.
- He believes in himself.
- His self-confidence is generally high.
Knowing oneself, respecting and loving one's self makes one feel confident in the steps one takes. Of course, the end of the path may not always lead to a very happy and bright place. But when the steps are taken confidently, no matter how dark the surroundings are, the feet will step on solid ground.
The individual can cope with the difficult situations he finds himself in, thanks to his self-belief, and can turn these experiences into insight that will benefit him.
What about Poor Self-Perception?
People with a poor sense of self have difficulty understanding their personalities and/or tend to be who they are with. Because a poor self-perception makes it difficult for a person to understand himself and know exactly what he wants, which leads to a deterioration in his self-perception. This can often lead to the formation of a negative self-perception, making the individual perceive himself negatively.
A person with a poor sense of self:
- He may feel indecisive when it comes time to make important choices. Because, in fact, he does not know himself well enough, misjudges himself or does not accept himself.
- May rely on those around him to make decisions.
- He/she may experience feelings such as not knowing what he/she wants, being lost, and helplessness.
- He tends to underestimate his own ideas, over-trust and entrust himself to those of those around him.
We can exemplify this with a situation like this:
Let's say there is someone you are not very close to, but you have met before in some environment. One day he comes to you and says he doesn't know how to continue his life. Which job should he get, which city should he live in... He is confused about these issues and wants you to tell him what he wants. Isn't it strange? This is actually a situation experienced by people whose sense of self is not well established or not strong enough.
So, How Do You Define Yourself?
Here we have included some questions that you can ask yourself to develop a good sense of self and that may motivate you to question yourself.
Try to review your life chronologically: What do you think has changed?
10 Years Ago…
- What were your goals?
- What did you like to do?
- Do you enjoy the same activities now?
- Or have you decided to try completely different hobbies?
- Or maybe you want to try something new but are afraid?
Today…
- Which values do you attach most importance to?
- Do you shape your own lifestyle according to your values?
- Does what you experience bring you closer to the person you want to be, that is, your ideal self?
- If you are not where you want, what steps do you want to take next?
- Which part of yourself are you most proud of?
- Can you see your mistakes and approach yourself with compassion at such times?
With these types of questions, you can observe the change and development you experience and improve your sense of self.
Footnote on Self-Perception
It is very difficult to understand, recognize, accept and evaluate the self objectively. Sometimes, while we think we know ourselves very well, we may suddenly start behaving in ways that surprise us. When we look back after a while, after passing the point where we say "I won't change anymore", we can actually see that a different nuance has been added to our identity with each step.
In short, we may not fully understand ourselves in every aspect until the end of our lives. No matter:) This is a situation that applies to everyone.
Because our personality and the functioning of our mind develop and change throughout our lives. A person's self-awareness is like light waves traveling through space. We travel towards infinity, but as we progress we realize an enlightenment.
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